Monday, October 03, 2011

What Sucks… Anwar al-Awlaki


Blown up over the weekend- ha, I love it. For those of you who don’t have your Al-Qaeda trading cards on hand (by the way, go with TOPPS, much better than Fleer) Anwar al-Awlaki is the guy often credited with coming up with the idea for the underwear bomber. Nice legacy dude!

By the way, memo to other al-qaeda:

Perhaps DON’T be the guy who is credited with coming up with the idea of putting explosives next to your junk, if your plan is, when you hit the after-life, to boink a shit-ton of virgins. These chicks are uneasy as it is! Adding the possibility of them having to defuse something Hurt Locker-style isn’t going to make the experience any less awkward!

By the way, can we say A-Qaeda is defeated now? I mean yes, they’re ruthless, murderous thugs, no doubt, but we’ve taken down the bad-asses of the group (KSM, OBL, etc) and now we’re dealing with an organization where the dude coming up with the idea of putting explosives next to your junk finds himself in the number three position? Their basically like Journey right now touring without Steve Perry and Neal Schon!

By the way- don’t think I didn’t try to shoe-horn a “I bet when he heard that drone missile getting close to where he was he made an ‘underwear bomb’ of his own” joke in here somewhere but couldn’t find the exact place to put it!

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