Thursday, July 30, 2009

What Sucks…Guys Who F Horses- Multiple Times!

The above video is 3:00 minutes of pure, 100 % wrongness. There are 180 seconds there, with 180 things here that are just not right. Time to live-blog something that should not be live-blogged…

:01 Technically, I’m gonna say it’s wrong that an anchorman of a local news station has to tell his news viewing public, that in the next story there will be “adult content” that “may not be suitable for everyone”. And then have that “adult content” be about someone F-ing a horse. For the 2nd time.

:13 Its also wrong for him to say “It’s a story you’ll only see on News Channel 15…” Why only News Channel 15? Is this an exclusive? Does News Channel 15 have a “Horse F-ing Reporter Beat”? Why shouldn’t all news channels have a chance to run the story? You don’t think that’s a big enough news item? “Man F’s Horse For 2nd Time”. Shit, there should be a media circus out there…

“…excuse me, Miss- are the man and the horse planning on getting married? Has the man F-ed other horses? Whose privates are hurting more right now?”

:18 It’s wrong to insinuate there was a debate being held in the newsroom regarding this story- unless the “debate” was about how F’d up was that police can’t keep a serial horse F-er off the streets. I know this reporter doesn’t mean the term “debate” as to whether or not its ethical to run the story- other horses could have been F-ed! Besides this is newsworthy. Its something you lead with. Something you break into an episode of The Bachelor for.

:23 Its wrong that when I heard “…there’s also some real pain, for a woman. who thought…” I thought, “holy shit, how many people are messing around with this horse?”

:27 This time reporter Graeme Moore points out something wrong. I agree, its wrong that a woman should have to feel the pain of having her horse sexually molested by a man, twice- even more wrong if it’s the same guy doing it, which it was.

:40 It’s wrong that when Graeme says “…not much goes on here…” you know he really should add, “I mean other than horse F-ing.”

:43 It’s wrong how much of a toll this is taking on Barbara Kenley- a simple google search reveals that she’s only 28 years old.

:51 It’s wrong that when Kenley speaks to her horse Sugar by saying “Hey whatcha doing?” Horse is unable to say, “recovering from rape. Can we get some fucking security here please?”

:56 It’s wrong for any reporter to have to say “But Kenley’s tranquil respite fell apart at the end of 2007 when she discovered a man had been having sex, with her horse.”

1:07 It’s wrong that a woman finds a man in a horse stall on Thanksgiving Day and that he tells her he had sex with her “horse of 15 years”- “and it wasn’t the first time”.

1:12 Ugh! He’s a black guy too? I AM KIDDING!!!!!!! Seriously, what is wrong with Rodell Vereen?

1:24 It’s wrong for a woman to HAVE to explain the sick feeling of having a man have sex with her horse.

1:27 It’s wrong that a man pleads guilty to a charge in relation to horse F-ing, and only gets 3 years probation- how crowded are the jails in SC?

1:34 It’s wrong that a judge who thought that forcing the guy to register as a sex offender, for F-ing a horse would be punishment enough. Judge, there is no “Secretariat’s Law”. Granted, its bad enough going around knocking on doors and introducing yourself to people as a sex offender, but that shit gets real weird, real fast when, as they are closing the door on your face you have to say “Hey wait, it was for a horse!”

1:51 It’s wrong that a woman would have to stay in the stables of her horses, keeping watch, so that a man does not come and have sex with the horses.

1:58 And it’s wrong to think, the one night she DOESN’T stay up with the horse is the night the guy comes back and molests it again. This is way beyond simple experimentation with horse F-ing. This dude at this point is a certified horse rapist.

2:01 This is where is gets even more wrong. “Her proof wasn’t solid…” Are you telling me the cops needed more to go on than what she had? How big is this police force? They couldn’t spare a guy to stake the stable out, in a pantomime horse suit? They’ve already caught this guy once! It’s a disgrace to horses that he’s out there walking the streets! Where are the police?!!? Guarding chickens? Chickens aren’t being F-d!

2:05 It’s wrong that this poor woman must install surveillance cameras- at what I’m guessing must be great personal expense (they don’t give you a discount for horse F-ing)- all to catch a dude F-ing her horse. How do you buy cameras for that?

…“Yeah, I need to set up a camera to catch a guy F-ing my horse…”

…“Yeah, whatever lady.”

2:10 It is wrong that a woman had to move her camera to “various spots” in order to get a good picture of him. (Him meaning the guy who F-d her horse.)

2:13 It’s wrong for a woman who has now had a picture of the guy F-ing her horse for two weeks, to have to catch him “red-handed”. What, are we trying to prove intent?

2:17 It’s wrong for a woman to sit in a stall, with a shot gun and have to wait for a guy to come to F her horse.

2:20 It’s NOT wrong for this woman to have caught the guy F-ing her horse and put a shotgun in his face, but it IS wrong for her to have to go through all the trouble to do it. Again, why does she have to sit there with the guy, holding a gun to his face? She should be calling some pipe-hittin’ horses and she should be getting all “Churchill Downs” on his ass.

2:23 It’s wrong that Barbara had to hold the guy there and wait for the cops. “…he didn’t resist or fight back or deny…” Damn right he didn’t, you had your goddamn gun on him.

2:28 It’s wrong she had to listen to him apologize to her. What, is she gonna let bygones be bygones? Dude, you repeatedly F-d her horse!!

2:50 It’s wrong the solicitor’s office in this town had to comment on this.

2:55 It’s wrong he can only get 5 years? This guy will be out in two- no colt is safe!

2:58 “Thanks Graeme, a judge set Vereen’s bail today at 10 thousand dollars…” 10K? There is no justice.

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Darkly said...

1:16 "she's like one of my children and this man has just totally taken the fun out of it." so this dude fucked her child and that took the fun out of it? isn't that kind of an understatement?

Mike Marsh said...

What I want to know is, what the hell happened to protecting the identity of rape victims? Now that poor horse has to live with knowing that atavistic stallions coast-to-coast are all saying, "Oh yeah, she totally wanted it."

CarneyUGVC said...

Wow, but I've seen crazier things! Isn't the Internet such a fun place?