Wednesday, September 10, 2008

What Sucks Salutes Giant Balls

…John McCain

So after 14 months of running on “experience”, you’re now gonna try to run on “change”? You, who have been in Washington for 26 years, part of the Republican Party that’s had the White House for the last 8, that has sat around while our country has circled the toilet, are now gonna tell people with a straight face, to vote for you, for change? Even though you’ve voted with George W. Bush 90 percent of the time- even after he personally smeared you when you first ran for President in 2000- your message is that you can “bring real change” to Washington- where you’ve been for 26 years? Add to this, your opponent- a young, fresh faced, extremely accomplished African American Senator who’s campaign slogan has been “Change You Can Believe In” has been running his campaign on change for the past 15 months. Balls. Huge ones.

…Sarah Palin

I have now seen 3 different YouTube clips where you’re speaking and supporting the infamous Alaskan “Bridge To Nowhere”. Yet you continue to be pitched as a reformer who said “no” to the project. The only thing you are reforming are the expectations we have as to how many kids a Governor can pop out. You rip Barack Obama for proposing a tax on windfall profits of oil companies, yet your state makes all of its money charging a tax on the oil that is drilled in Alaska. Finally, no one knows who the fuck you are- except that you like your kids to play hockey and were the mayor of a town with 6000 people in it before you were governor for 15 months, and you freak out and accuse people of misogyny when they want to ask you questions. Balls. Large, shiny ones.

…The McCain Campaign

You release this ad, which not only refers to articles that were in reality more anti-McCain than Obama, it also claims at the end, that Obama wanted to give Sex Ed to Kindergartners when in reality, the proposed law was designed to educate children to know the difference between appropriate and inappropriate touching. Also, parents of said kids could opt out of the class if they chose to and oh yeah finally, ah, Obama didn’t write it. Grapes.

…The White House

The White House Press Secretary, Dana Perino said yesterday that the US doesn’t have “Super powers” to catch Bin Laden, adding this “isn’t a movie”. Really- after 7 years and two wars, you “don’t have super powers” and “this isn’t a movie” becomes an acceptable way to answer the question as to “why don’t you have Bin Laden yet?” Gigantic, pumpkin sized balls.


Anonymous said...

extremely accomplished? he only became senator cause some guy like to whip his wife in bed

deluca said...

every time you whip your wife america's future may be greatly influenced!

Anonymous said...

gigantic is a funnier word than giant

MC Sweeney said...

i love your post.

mc sweeney said...

i mean, i love deluca's post(s).

Anonymous said...

Amen DeLuca!!! Huge, Gigantic balls doesn't even begin to stratch the surface for these a-holes and if they win than Americans should get what they deserve.