Tuesday, April 15, 2008
What Sucks…Ashley Simpson Pregnant or Not Pregnant, Country Divided Between Those Who Could, And Couldn’t Give A Shit
As the ongoing drama of whether or not Ashley Simpson is pregnant unfolds, Americans find themselves falling into two groups: those who could seriously give a shit, and those who couldn’t.
Simpson, who was recently engaged to Pete Wentz, and was rumored to be pregnant this week, today went on MTV’s TRL to deny the rumors. The denials come a day after her fiancée, Wentz, the leader singer of Fall Out Boy, referred to the controversy as a "witch hunt". Mind you, none of these events mean shit to anyone.
Simpson, whom America last gave a shit about when she was seen awkwardly doing a jig offstage after a track she was lip-synching to on Saturday Night Live skipped, is also known for having a radical nose job- which actually made her look better- and having a dad who is way, way too into his other daughter, Jessica’s boobs.
Increasingly, Americans seem to be leaning towards not giving a shit about anything Ashlee Simpson does or says. A recent announcement by her of intentions to have a green wedding, was met with an apathy Americans normally reserve for the cover of this week’s Bird Watcher’s Digest and Americans as a whole have long stopped caring about why she spells her name the way she does as opposed to “Ashley”, and that she is even , in fact, someone who puts out albums.