Wednesday, November 28, 2007

What Sucks...Quick Hits!

…The NFL other than the Patriots

Can someone please at least look like they belong on the same field as the Pats? Belichick is coaching this year like he’s playing Madden. Every play Brady is throwing for the end zone- I don’t think they’ve punted since week three.

…People Magazine

Matt Damon is the Sexiest Man Alive. Really, is that the best we can do? Who came in 2nd? The guy from “Life Goes On”? Rocky Dennis? Who does McDreamy have to blow to get this award, cause seriously, tell him and he’ll do it!

…The Spice Girls

They’re back? Great. I’d rather see SARS reemerge. By the way, can we stop calling them “girls” and start calling them the Spice “Chicks A Rich Eurotrash Guy Coming Off His 1st Divorce Will Probably End Up With”?

…Stores opening at 4AM on the day after Thanksgiving

It just occurred to me- can we do earlier than 4 AM next year? I just had dinner with my family- I’d go to a book burning to get out of house.

Oh, and are we eating too much turkey? Cause my mom is making me a “white meat sweater” with the leftovers we had and TG was a week ago.

…Dog From “Dog The Bounty Hunter”

I am still personally shocked that a man who looks like this, and who’s name is “Dog The Bounty Hunter” is a racist. Does this man look like he’d use the N Word? No, he looks like he invented the “N word”. He looks like every time the N Word is used he gets a residual which he then donates to a foundation to create more racial slurs.

Nice crimped mullet by the way.


todd said...

This is the single best paragraph I've read about Dog, The Bounty Hunter. Thanks for that.

Invisible Woman said...

Dog comment=brilliant

Little Miss Smoke and Mirrors said...

I know... it's always a shock when a guy with an extreme mullet isn't a perfect gentleman.