Thursday, August 30, 2007

What Sucks…Axl Rose


F Axl Rose.

Little background here- I was thumbing through a recent Rolling Stone- not last week’s certain Pulitzer Prize winning edition with the kid from High School Musical on it, nor was it this week’s follow up with Maroon 5 on the cover, both of which reminds me…

What Sucks…Rolling Stone Sucks.


Hey Rolling Stone, WTF?!!

…it was the one from 3 weeks ago with the cover story- Appetite For Destruction turns twenty. (TWENTY, Jesus!) On the cover? Guns N’ (Fucking) Roses in all their glory.

Say what you will about G&R now with 20 years gone by since they burst onto the scene- the excess, the hair, Slash’s hat- but let me remind you that today, we have The Shins, so it’s okay to be nostalgic for rock bands that were all about having sex with girls (and mainlining heroin).

That being said, reading this article, G&R is a band who’s Appetite For Destruction came complete with real woman’s orgasm sounds (Sweet Child O’ Mine) that were actually coming from an encounter between the singer and the drummer’s girlfriend. That’s freaking rock and roll.

The point? “F” Axl Rose. This insane a-hole paralyzed and dismantled a kick-ass band capable of Zeppelin- esque overindulgence for no other reason than that he is bat shit crazy. Just look at what’s transpired in the intervening years. Axl went bald and got bad hair plugs, recorded or at least tried to record a note for note remake of Appetite For Destruction, toured with a band called “Guns N Roses” in which he was the only real member and worked on an album called “Chinese Democracy” which is longer in the works than actual Chinese democracy.

So yeah, maybe Guns ‘N Roses sputter out weakly on their own- and sure, it certainly seemed like they were on their way out- but that decision should be made by the Gods of Rock and Roll and their servants named drugs and booze- not some fake tanned wacko with dreadlock plugs.

22 comments:

wade said...

well done

dehumidifier said...

Axl Rose looks pregnant. With a burrito, most likely.

the Mickey's said...

Well you're right about one thing for sure, rs does suck. I remember reading it when it was a newspaper. It was cool then (for some reason).

A voice teacher I know predicted axl would be dead 10 yrs ago.

"Never take screech lessons!"
-john fogerty

Your readers should know that if ?artists dont keep their chops up , they lose `em.


I went to twin camp w/ bob powers.

pale male said...

point of order:

the female squeals of pleasure

appear on (nay, anchor!) the final track on Appetite

which is "Rocket Queen"

Diarrhea of the Mouth said...

i loved that CD! it was their best by far.
i loved it so much i started out witht he tape then bought the CD when it came out in CD. love it love it love it...until my parents found it and broke it in half telling me it was the devils music.

Anonymous said...

It is obvious to me that it is author of this blog that sucks and NOT Axl. It just shows what a lowlife he is trying to make money off of making things that are cool seem like they suck....goof.

RockChic14 said...

I agree with anonymous! You losers have nothing beeter to do with your time than trash one of the greatest musicians of all fucking time!Axl Rose is one of the greatest frontmen from one of the greatest most long standing bands of all fuccking time. Hes is an utter legend and he is and forever will be nothing short of that.

Suck on that you contemptable scum!

James said...

Some people have nothing better to do than search for blog posts about Axl Rose and comment on them.

Still, shame on the author for clearly knowing nothing about the band. Sex noises on Sweet Child O' Mine? Surely not!

Anonymous said...

ok, for starters, im a 16 year old girl and even i know that Guns N' Roses kik ass. axl rose is a god of rock and roll and if u had ne taste what so ever you would be worshiping at his feet. i stumbled across this blog whilst looking for axl rose posters (of which there is a distinct lack btw) and had to read u weridos witter on about one of the best mag's of all time. and secondly, if u think that RS sux so much then y do u bother reading it? and more importantly y do u bother posting stupid blogs about it? seriously, wots wrong with you? no taste and no life? Gee's. grow up would ya? and ps: y does eveyone feel the need to write 'fucking' after or before everything they say? for emphasis or something? well tbh it just makes u sound like a lil gobshite. ok?

Anonymous said...

The orgasm sounds were in the song Welcome to the jungle...just so you know...

Anonymous said...

the orgasm sounds were in the track "Rocket Queen", number 12 i think.

Sarah said...

Axl rose is the best anyone who says he sucks is probably some person with no life and no friends and wants to seem cool over the web but really hes probably some big nerd who only listens to the disney channel music like Hannah Montana or something but axl rose makes real music I LOVE AXL ROSE

what sucks...stupid people said...

its rocket queen. how can any of you think sweet child o mine or welcome to the jungle has an orgasm in it when those two songs are the two most known songs by gnr. by the way...i bet you couldn't make the drummer's girlfriend orgasm, asshole.

Curtis said...

I found it hilarious that you opened your post with "ok, for starters, im a 16 year old girl" as if it would lend credence to your opinion. Well, if 16 year old girl says Axl Rose is talented, we better shut the books on this one!

Yeah, I'm going to take lessons in good taste and music appreciation from a 16 year old girl with the typing skills of a epileptic chair.

Oh, what's that? You also like Rolling Stone? Fuck you. I hereby order you to relinquish your right to breathe.

Anyways, the only thing that abhors me more than knowing that human beings like Axl Rose exist is the fact that he has millions of fans exactly like him. Indeed, there are few people in the world that I actively hate, and only one person whose death I will actually celebrate. Axl Rose has the honor of topping both of those lists.

Kiona said...

I just came across this shit about Axl rose and wanted to leave my two cents worth...If you dont like Axl Rose then why waste your time bitching about him?What is it with you small minded people who think if you use big words others will think your opinion is worth anything??Your obviously really jealous of others and thats sad..oh well,maybe for that shit comment on celebrating Axl's death you will find your own end alot closer than his,Karma is an amazing thing...PS. Axl Rose is a ledgend,Gunners music is awsome!!LONG LIVE AXL ROSE!!

Anonymous said...

How can anyone not say that Axl sucks? He single handedly tore Guns N' Roses apart. He fired Izzy who wrote most of the songs because he didn't have stage presence. He made Matt, Duff, and Slash quit because of his rediculous demands. If you don't believe me read the GNR bio or Slash's autobiography, it's all fact.

You guys all cry because GNR doesn't exist anymore but then you sit there and have Axl's back no matter what. Axl is the reason GNR isn't here today. I hate Axl because he was such a dbag and tore them apart. I don't understand how other GNR fans can still love the guy.

ps. Axl is nothing without Slash, Duff, and Izzy. Axl is not a rock legend, his bandmates in GNR were and they made him what he was.

Anonymous said...

AXEL SUX

AXEL SUX

AXEL SUX


AXEL SUX

GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY

Anonymous said...

GO TO HELL AXEL ROSE

YOU SUCK!!!

Anonymous said...

Firstly, I would bet that those whom have posted here have never known him on a personal level, at anytime.

Secondly, that being stated, briefly did. I'm dreadful with the keeping dates, numbers, and the like- but I was 17, and living in Hollywood. At this time, as a pont of reference- "Lies" was released, and "Patience" was number one.

Being that I happen to be female, one would incorrectly assume the worst! No, contrary to whatever the image is of a person of such magnitude possess, nobody had ever treated me with such honesty and care, as he did. I was a sitting duck. He did not take advantage of my disadvantage, that being young and naive... and far too trusting.

It was always a learning experience for me during this brief time period we spent together. I will tell you what I believe.

One very important thing that is within Axl, and sadly absent in most others, is that he is a very honest person. Period. He has always stated in private, or public (when necessary) exactly what he feels. It is not to be a prick. He truly wears his heart on his sleeve.
This attribute is very,very rare. And incredibly brave. How many men or women, for that matter do you have in your life who are sincerely honest? He address things very straight, without double talking. Yes, he is not shy to express anger sometimes. But I recall when I was around, it was for a valid reason that he recognized. Not a "diva" although it is understandable how this could be wrongly perceived.

I had met his brother, Stewart once ago when he had a small BBQ at his former residence at Shoreham Towers. It gave me an insight watching the two of them interact. Both highly intelligent, and the two of them would behave in an incredibly funny fashion! A pleasure to be around.

It's no secret that he was emotionally blind sighted by his family at an early age. I had been, as well. Pain is a great motivator. Coupled with being in touch with his past issues and having the strength to deal with it, out loud or in private, in highly respectable. It is not easy. Trust me! Let this man breathe, and get through things. I pray he shall.

I find it sickening that his former manager would refer to him in his former name. I hope this man who delights in taking very cheap shots, pays the price in full, when all said and done. Unprofessional, undignified, and cruel.

I am not in touch with Axl, nor have I seen him in several years. I happened to be up all night again, through the maze of the internet, a arrived here. To learn about what this man has gone through with his former band (which frankly I feel is none of my business) along with the court dramas and stresses, I find it incredible that he remains vigilant and in tact, for I would have crumbled long ago. I feel compassion for him right now because he is such a talent, an amazing person, (and by what I have just read on their site) has NOT changed one single bit! I remember how articulately stylish he was...
He is not corrupted by fame. If anything, the leaches have made many attempts to attach and bleed his skin. How would you feel?

This is someone who has been raped by the ill intentions of others, and is still standing. Yet still, has NEVER sold out, and kept true to himself and his beliefs. It is NOT our place to judge anyone.
Believe me, he is harder on himself than anyone I have ever passed by in this peculiar life. I had not followed him, nor G&R, until reading tonight. I applaud his strength, courage, and bravery.

The very best of luck and success to Dearest Mr. Ming(!), and my finest of wishes to you always!

- V. Adrien (N.Y.C.)

Anonymous said...

I never really understood the big hype about Axl. I thought GnR had cool tunes but could never stomach the vocals....Axl's voice is horrific. It's just a terrible, screechy, nasally voice.

Anonymous said...

Nice call. Someone should tell this guy that false information sucks too...

WARrior said...

V. Adrien of NYC....
I applaud your words and glad you could shed some light for the morons who "know" Axl as much as they know an alien from space.
I do a ton of reading about the band and the man...authorized and unauthorized. I watch interviews, listen to his rants during concerts, read between the lines and take the negative with a grain of salt until proven otherwise...which no one can say anything about him as a person except the same ole thing over and over.
I get so sick of people hating on him for his antics and personal life. ..that is not WHO he is, in my opinion.
Thank you for sharing your insights to the man who, to me, is someone who has had his struggles but overall, is more of a man than most could ever attempt to be.
Love to you, precious one.