Wednesday, May 23, 2007

A What Sucks Investigative Report…What Is The Coolest, Racist Thing? Today’s Feature: The General Lee


Hey, everybody knows racism just isn’t cool. That’s a no brainer, but what’s also a no brainer is that racism exists. So I pose the question- what’s the coolest, racist thing? When you think about it, I think you can make a case for the General Lee.

The General Lee, the car used by the Duke boys on the Dukes of Hazzard, may very well be, the coolest, racist thing. The supped up Dodge Charger that flew through the air at least once or twice an episode- that had it’s doors welded shut so that you had to go in through the window and that was fast enough to outrun any police car in Georgia, was pretty damn sweet. You could slide across its hood or dive across the roof- and it never failed to deliver a little extra pop when Roscoe or Cletus was in pursuit.

So what if the car was a racist and was named after the general for the south in the Civil War? So what if it had a confederate flag painted on its roof and when you hit the horn it played the confederate national anthem, “Dixie”? So what if it extolled many of the rallying cries held by men who fought and died for an America where Freedom was only for a few? It wasn’t like the General Lee ever parked itself outside a voting registration drive revved its engine every time someone new came by. Right?

Yes it had its bad traits, sure- its implicit call for a segregated state, for one- the time it “escorted” an El Dorado that was playing loud music out of Hazzard County (on a 4th season DVD extra) for another- the fact that it had to get pretty lousy gas mileage, for a third- but if you wanted politically correct values, you always had NBC’s answer to the General Lee- KITT, an effete Pontiac Sunbird.

So yeah, the General Lee wasn’t perfect, especially is you consider an element of “perfection” to be "not racist", but among all racist things, it was pretty damn cool.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Shocked silence.

a fan said...

you know what sucks? im not gonna say anything about your topic but it sucks that Dave Chappelle went to Africa thats not cool hes like the funniest dude on earth and we should deport him over here and get a court order to continue Chappelles show