Tuesday, March 13, 2007

What Sucks...Van Halen


You’re being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and the best you can do is have Sammy Hagar and the guy with the JD Bass show up?

Where’s Eddie? Where’s Diamond Dave? Where’s Alex? It’s easier to get Israel and the PLO in the same room.

I thought after you tried to hire the guy from Extreme as your lead singer you couldn’t be a bigger bunch of dicks. I was wrong.

Last night Van Halen was kind of inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Not that you’d know if you were there. The lineup they were able to produce featured…

- Sammy Hagar (no longer in band)
- Michael Anthony (no longer in band)
- Paul Schaffer (never in band)
- A bunch of dudes from Velvet Revolver. (in Velvet Revolver)

That's it.

Only one person who appeared in the Hot For Teacher video? That’s weak.

And now your reunion tour is cancelled? Guess what? Like ANY of us thought you’d show up in the first place. Axl Rose is looking at you a-holes and shaking his head. Get your shit together.


What did this homeless man do with Eddie Van Halen?

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is that Tawnee Kaitan in the background?

todd said...

i just read somewhere that (and this is not a joke) david lee roth was actually invited to the reunion but wouldn't do it when the band refused to let him perform "jump." they didn't want to bring a keyboard into the mix just for the one song and suggested "jamie's cryin'" and "you really got me" instead, but roth had his heart set on "jump."

maybe, even as a trainwreck, at least it wasn't the two-commercial-jets-crashing-into-the-wtc that i would have been if roth was permitted to perform "jump."

LA said...

todd - You heard right, and David Lee Roth is a jackass.

Anonymous said...

Wow, was Van Halen *ever* cool?

Anonymous said...

They were cool for about two weeks ... in 1978.

Anonymous said...

I wish more people would not show up to the Hall of Fame. That said Eddie is a dick.

Diamond Dave wanted to bring a keyboard and do Jump? DLR hates 1984 and the keyboards. He always felt it was a crap direction so either you are wrong or Diamond Dave is being and ass. You are probably wrong cause despite what I thought for 20 years everyone else in the band is a bigger jerk thank Dave.