Going to the bathroom on a plane- the worse experience of your life? Pretty close, right? Did you know that a recent survey said the only place more stressful to "go" in, is Baghdad.
If ever there was something which sucked thoroughly, I mean from beginning to end, it might be the experience of going into a bathroom on an plane. First of all, there's so much bacteria there, you can basically see it with the naked eye. Public toilet seats are disgusting in stationary bathrooms- by the time you’re in an airplane, traveling at 400 MPH, with any turbulence at all, let's face it, everyone using it is shooting at best, 60 percent.
Plus, they’re tiny. Are we contortionists? I heard once that 2/3 of all men who attempt to sit on an airplane toilet end up blowing themselves.
The sink is the worst in the world. We have to be able to do better here- don’t tell me we lack the technology- we’re flying for Christ sakes. Why is the plunger constantly down? Are we supposed to be using that water?
And the door. A bending door that also activates the light only gives you the feeling that you are in a refrigerator, where you are allowed to shit.
The announcement that you shouldn’t tamper with the smoke detector there is also bothersome. What, are people going into the airplane lavatory with an old novel, dismantling the smoke detector and lighting up a pipe? I'm sickened by the stories of people who join the mile high club in there- who can remain sexually aroused with that smell surrounding you? Besides Germans.
Yes, vacant of hope of not experiencing something awful.